Critique on Article about love...

Alright so- got a magazine that is sent out to North Metro/Boulder County area- "What's Love Got to do with it?" by Dylan Krider. It had this article in it that attempted to explain how love got started... "The latest science says romance has a lot in common with war, narcotics, and meat"... yeah- I know. It caught my attention as well. Basically it starts by using the example of Adam and Eve... asking what it was that actually gave us the "potential" to act against our instincts and do what is right as opposed to "spreading our genes".

The article goes on to talk about how with animals- only the ones with higher levels of intelligence have been show to develop close working relationships with its own kind. Saying there's a direct correlation between the "socialness" of an animal and it's inherit intelligence. Alright- I can get that.. it makes sense. Then it goes into how as humans became smarter- more women started to die during childbirth due to increased head circumference... so when you can only have one maybe two offspring at a time- a lot rides on it's survival- genetically speaking. Men took on the roles of "provider" only after it became apparent that increased protein led to healthier, longer living kiddos. Keep in mind- while men were out spearing things, women were busy laying the groundwork for modern civilization... agriculture, pottery, education... you name it.

Now is when I really got interested... the genetic basis for "cheating".... so the article says "...women are genetically wired to ensure they're impregnated by their lover- NOT their husband." He goes on to say.." as a general rule- you can determine the promiscuity of females as a species by the size of the males testes. For example, the enormous but monogamous gorilla only sports a pair of golf balls, whereas the female chimp....is courted by bow-legged males who look like they're lugging around a bag of canteloupe."
- I guess to me- this seems contradictory. Espcially since most men's "ahem" are much more comprable to golf balls than to canteloupe. So to me- the whole idea that men are "hardwired" to spread their seed doesn't exactly get it's roots in nature. Guess I'll have to add that to my list of questions to ask an ecologist (closely followed by the need for the pinky finger).

The article goes on to cite a recent study that boasts figures of anywhere from 45-55% of married women and 50-60% of married men have strayed at some point in their relationship.
HOLY CRAP... that's over half of the married men. The premise of this is to point out that while we are "wired" to cheat... that there must be a reason.. or force... powerful enough to nip the urge to cheat in the bud... enter dopamine.

The heroine of lovers... dopamine, is the said cause to keep wandering eyes (and other parts) in check. Krider goes as far to say that once dopamine wears off- that the attachment is formed- and the bond is solid- and strong enough to keep the want to cheat in check.

This is where I disagree- someone can have a bond without first having the dopamine fix. Look at frienship- for example. This easy example leads me to believe that there's much more to a lasting love than simply "bonding during the love high". Anyone who has been married for more than 15 years can tell you that. Hell- I've been married for two years and I promise you it's more than just a love-struck bond between my husband and I. Marriage is work. Marriage is a lot of work. There is no environmental/animalistic benefit to have to work so hard at something that can completely drive you crazy. So what is it that keeps people married? To me- it's the love of that person. Not looking at what they can do for you, and if they do enough- its beneficial to have them around (given those kinds are nice- but definitely not worth a lifetime of faking it). Most people enter into a marriage because the person complements their personality, lifestyle, timing, beliefs, etc.

In summary, if a person isn't happy- they'll cheat regardless of genetics. I have a hard time believing that cheating genes are the cause of adultery. Let's take a good hard look at a theory before giving "cheaters" and out to use as an excuse.

So I'm a Slacker!

Fine Fine... I'll admit- I've been slacking on the blogging side of things. However- I must say that I've got a dang good excuse... for those of you who know me- I am slightly competitive... FINE I'm EXTREMELY competitive- I said it OKAY. Anything that is capable of being won by me- I will try to win it. That's just how I am... with that being said... Jan. 15 I entered into a "fitness challenge" at the gym I go to- OneBoulder Fitness. It is a two month competition that basically pushes contestants to keep a daily food journal- and document everything you eat- keeping track of calorie values, protein content, carbs, fat, fiber...etc. I thought this was a fantastic way to channel my motivation for my lifestyle makeover. And well... It has been! The way it works is you start off with a beginning weight, total body measurements, body fat %... then you do a series of tests that supposedly test your "fitness". So basically- I've been working out 6 days a week now for about a month.. at my midpoint check in- I had lost 6 lbs.. almost 7 inches.. and my body fat % had decreased by 6% points. I was amazed. My endurance is better than it was in highschool... I was actually able to run 3 miles without stopping at the end of the first month- something I was NEVER able to do before... and I've been reminded that "round" isn't the shape of my face. Needless to say... been a little busy juggling being a mom, working and getting into "Hot Momma" shape :). However... I was reminded that this is such a healthy outlet for me. I'm really going to try and do better at it because I love writing.

My point today is that I'm happy with how I'm looking- and I really haven't been able to say that honestly in a very long time.
I've found out that I have a passion for helping people succeed. If the economy wasn't the way it was... you can bet your sweet butt I'd be getting certified to be a trainer and nutrition advisor. I love it and it truly makes me happy- while still being able to help other people.

However... until I'm able to seriously entertain that idea... I'm TOTALLY happy doing the job I have... which I love. Because like I've learned... you've gotta make the best of whatcha got.